Without Reserve
by FicThisGifAnonContest
Summary: Bella sees him all the time as he mans the reserves desk at the campus library. She thinks she's got him pegged. What she doesn't know might surprise her. ExB


**Gif #: 42**

**Title: Without Reserve**

**Word Count: 6,877**

**Pairing: E/B**

**Rated: M**

**Summary: Bella sees him all the time as he mans the reserves desk at the campus library. She thinks she's got him pegged. What she doesn't know might surprise her.**

**SM owns Twilight. I own these two crazy kids.**

...

It was Friday afternoon, and once again, I found myself walking through campus to get to the library. It was my routine every week. This last semester had been killer because I was taking two art history courses on top of all my studio credits. It translated into a lot of work and frequent trips to the reserve desk.

A light drizzle began to fall, so I ran until I reached the shelter of the breezeway. I took a moment to catch my breath and shake the raindrops off my backpack before heading into the library.

I needed to head upstairs. The reserve collection was on the fifth floor with all the media stuff, including slide carousels, huge art history surveys, trade journals, and a wide open area filled with computers and desks with outlets for our laptops. A few people were around, heads stuck in books and eyes glued to their screens, but that was not me today.

Before stepping into the elevator, I sent Alice, my best friend, a text, letting her know I'd be around in about an hour to study at her place and to go ahead and order food. As the elevator doors opened, I stashed the phone in my bag and huffed towards the reserves desk, but then I realized the rain had probably done a number on my hair, so I made a little detour to the bathroom across the walkway.

"Great. I look like a wet rat," I said to myself. I smoothed out my hair a bit and reapplied my lip gloss. When I was satisfied with what I saw in the reflection in front of me, I collected my things and headed on over to get what I needed.

I tapped the little silver bell on the high counter and waited. He was probably in the back reading. I could feel a little instinctual smile play on my lips when I saw him—shoulders slumped, shaggy bronze hair flopped over, and his face hidden in the open book in his hands.

"Uh, hi, can I help you... oh, hey, Bella," he said when he finally looked up. He pushed his big black-rimmed glasses back into place with his finger and gave a cautious little smile. It was really more of a slight lift of one side of his mouth. He looked at me but immediately shied away, as always.

We had a ritual.

"Hi, Edward. Anyone ever tell you not to read and walk?" I teased.

He snorted lightly. "Yeah, I guess it isn't a great idea when you think about it."

I smiled in response. "How are you today? Ready for the weekend?"

"Um, yeah, I suppose," he replied quietly, taking the printout of reserved listings I needed and my student ID from my hands. His fingers only touched mine for a second, but there was always something about it. I always felt a little tingle. He moved to sit in front of his computer screen to scan my card and look up the items' location in the back room.

I met Edward last semester when I'd taken Contemporary Art History and had to check out countless art history surveys. He'd been super shy and hardly ever talked to me or even looked at me. To most people he was invisible—just another no-name library boy. But I knew better.

I soon managed to coax him into short little conversations. He was sweet and smart, and I enjoyed listening to him talk. The weeks passed, and I looked forward to whatever interesting bits of information I got from him. It turns out we liked a lot of the same things. Or at least, I could hang.

He was brilliant, a senior in the engineering program, minoring in sociology.

"Watcha reading?" I pushed forward as if to look over the counter and catch a glimpse of the title.

"A Song of Ice and Fire. It's a whole series. I'm on the first one." A while back, he wouldn't have been comfortable enough to share like this, but we were friends now.

"Ooooh, I love Game of Thrones. I'm so stuck on that show. No one's allowed to bother me on Sunday nights. I've been thinking of reading the books."

"You really should. The show is great, but the books have so much backstory, and the characters are so well written. You'd love it." He stopped himself, adjusting his glasses again and seemingly reigning himself in before he got too animated.

I nodded encouragingly. "Cool. Maybe I can borrow your copy when you're done?"

I knew I could just download it onto my Kindle, but for some reason, I liked the idea of him sharing something of his with me.

Edward seemed surprised for a moment but smiled shyly, as always, and nodded.

We small-talked some more before he slid the books over to me.

"Thanks. I'll see you next week," I said with a grin before hauling my stuff off the counter.

He waved back as I looked at him again over my shoulder.

"See you later, Bella. Good luck on your test."

Thankfully, the rain had let up, and I made my way to Allie's for our study session.

...

"Every time I watch Star Wars, I can't help but see all the allusions to religion and faith. It's really more than just a Jungian hero's journey, isn't it?" I commented a week later as Edward retrieves my list. We'd been talking the Star Wars marathon they'd played on TV, and it snowballed from there.

"Yeah, definitely. The philosophy of the Jedi, their monk-like status, the ideas behind The Force. Even Han's reluctance to believe, it's really all about having faith in something bigger than yourself."

He was in a good mood today.

I smiled at seeing his hair stick out all over the place. He was constantly raking his hands through it. It was more nervous habit than an attempt at taming it.

As the conversation lulled, he presented me with my books for the week.

"Here you go, Bella. Neoclassical painting in France. It's one of my favorite eras in art history."

"Oh, yeah?" I asked absently, skimming through the books, making sure they were all there. I noticed one that wasn't on the list.

"Hey, you're losing your touch, Cullen. This one's not mine." I slid the book towards him."Uh, yeah. Actually, I..." He fumbled with his words a bit, the old timid version of him coming out. I looked at him curiously. "I thought maybe you'd like to take a look at this one. I... it's actually mine. Um, I'm a bit of a history geek, and this book talks about the Jacobins and Marat and how it all blew up in Marat's face. I thought maybe, since you were studying Jaques-Luis David, that you'd... I don't know...," he rambled, his face red as a tomato.

"Edward." I stopped him, placing my hand on top of his to calm him.

He stopped speaking, staring only at our connection. I stopped to stare, too, taken aback by the warmth that spread through me in that moment.

We were frozen in place for what seemed like minutes before I broke away.

"Edward. Thank you. I'd love to read it," I replied quietly, moving my hand away slowly, the warmth of his skin still tattooed on mine.

...

Another week of painting and studying passed before I found myself in the student center, hanging work up with other art majors. We did this every so often, learning to curate and organize coherent works together. It was great exposure for student artists and made art accessible to those who were either uninformed or just didn't care enough to seek it out.

Alice was picking up the hammers and levels and told me she'd meet me at the campus coffee shop. As I collected the last of the supplies and took one last look at the work we'd accomplished, I spotted a familiar form at the other end... in front of my painting.

My heart sped up. I didn't know why. Maybe it was just knowing that he was looking at such a personal part of me that made me nervous. Or maybe I was worried he wouldn't like it. The prospect bothered me more than I thought it would.

The bottom line was I valued his opinion.

So after wiping my suddenly clammy hands on my paint-splattered jeans, I walked slowly towards him, finally taking a moment to observe him head to toe.

Not bad.

He was tall and lean, jeans hanging just right and scuffed sneakers. He wore his usual black hoodie and had his backpack over one shoulder.

I smiled when I saw the crazy hair and the black-rimmed glasses though.

He was cute. A little dorky, a lot handsome.

"Hey," I finally said before his head snapped towards me, hair flopping in front of his glasses from the force.

"H... hi, Bella. I, I didn't know you were here." He sounded out of breath.

"Yeah, I was just finishing up. We were hanging all this earlier." I gestured to my piece casually, though inside I was a jumble of nerves. "So, what do you think?"

He took another look at the painting before he spoke.

"It's really nice."

I smiled and felt myself blush.

"Thanks. I was so nervous about that going up."

"Yeah, I know how hard it is to put a part of yourself out there for everyone to see, to scrutinize," he said, still studying the canvas.

"Really? Have you ever had to do that before?" Now I was really curious.

Maybe he hadn't heard me. Maybe he was too absorbed in looking at my work. Or maybe he just didn't want to talk about it, because he didn't answer.

"It's you, right?" he asked suddenly, moments later. My eyes snapped to him. He ducked his head and continued to look at the painting. "I mean, the image, it's you."

_Nice way to change the subject, Edward._

"How could you tell?" I replied, rather rattled that someone could see me in all that swirl of skin and color.

"I don't know. I think… there's an essence to it. I knew it was you right away," he said. His eyes shifted to me briefly before looking anywhere but at me.

I stared at him, in awe of his ability to interpret what he saw so clearly. I wondered what else he could see.

"Yeah, it's—it's me. I wasn't sure it would translate the way I wanted it to—"

"It does. It's really amazing, Bella." He looked at me timidly one final time before moving toward the door.

"I guess I'll see you around," he mumbled, walking away from me.

But I wanted more time. I needed more time.

"Wait, Edward... wait!" I shouted.

He froze and turned back to face me.

"Where are you going?"

"Uh, I was just… I usually get some coffee before heading to the library," he responded, confused.

Perfect. "I was heading over there myself. You mind if I tag along?"

That little smirk I'd come to love made an appearance, and I smiled back as he nodded.

I quickly grabbed the rest of my stuff and skipped over to him before we headed off to the cafe.

Conversation was stilted, both of us stealing glances of each other as we walked. Why was I so nervous about this? It was just Edward.

But then things started to thaw out. We talked about our classes, and he told me stories about his crazy engineering professor with the bad teeth, and by the time we made it to the coffee bar, we were laughing and grinning brightly.

_Holy hell, he's got a nice smile_, I thought.

As soon as we walked inside, I saw Alice wave to me from her corner table. I waved back in acknowledgement.

"Is that your friend?" Edward asked as we got in line to order.

"Yeah, that's Alice. She's a little nutty, but she's really nice. Hey, would you like to meet her?"

He suddenly got nervous, shifting his weight around and fidgeting with a wayward string on his hoodie, like he really didn't know how to answer. Maybe he had trouble meeting new people. He'd told me once he didn't have many friends, just a few from the engineering program. I decided not to push.

"Oh, never mind. You probably have to hurry, right? Maybe some other time."

He nodded appreciatively and seemed to relax as soon as I let him off the hook.

When he got to the counter, he gave the girl his order and then turned to me and asked what I was having.

"Oh, no, I can get mine. I just wanted the company," I said, suddenly feeling flushed at the mere idea of him buying me coffee. Why was I being so weird about this?

"No, please, I insist. Consider it a congratulatory cup for getting your piece into the show," he said as his cheeks flushed pink in full view. He was adorable.

"Okay, Edward. But next time, it's on me, okay?"

And all too soon, his name was called, and he handed off my latte before saying goodbye and leaving for his shift.

"Who was that hottie?" Alice asked as soon as I sat down.

"Who?" I asked, still dumbfounded about what just happened.

"That guy! He was hot, in a geeky kind of way. You know what they say, B. The nerds rule the world. He's totally into you, by the way."

"What?" She had to be joking.

"Uh, yeah. Body language, my friend. The energy was practically buzzing around the both of you," she added before taking a huge bite of her bagel.

I sat there in utter silence. What did Alice see that I didn't? There was nothing going on between Edward and me.

Was there?

"No, Alice. You're seeing things again. He's not into me. We're just friends. He's really smart. He wouldn't be into an art major. He works at the reserves desk in the library. He's... just no," I rambled.

Alice just nodded, in a "yeah, sure" kind of way.

I sipped the best coffee I'd ever had that afternoon and let Alice's words stew while she spoke of his "adorkable glasses" and taking chances.

...

Midterms were upon us, and my stress level was through the roof. Aside from my painting frenzy to finish the work in time for our huge critique, I had to study for my art history test. Twenty-five slides would be presented for identification. This meant using the library's AV rooms to memorize over a hundred works.

I was on the phone with Alice as I entered the elevator.

"No, Allie, I can't tonight. I've gotta pull an all-nighter to finish these paintings. The critique's tomorrow... Yes. _Yes_, of course I remember. Well I'm at the library right now so... okay... yeah, seven tomorrow sounds good. I should be out of there by four. 'Kay. Bye."

Alice planned a nice outing to celebrate acing my critique tomorrow. That's just what I needed: a couple of drinks to let loose before I had to cram Sunday.

I sighed as I exited the elevator and made my way to the restroom before seeing Edward. It had become part of my routine for the last few weeks, and I was finally starting to acknowledge that I wanted to look more... presentable around him. I wanted to look nice.

The coffee shop episode had been a bit of a turning point for me in terms of what I was feeling for my shy friend. And Alice's comments basically opened a Pandora's Box of insecurity, confusion, and a torrent of butterflies every time I saw him, or even_ thought_ about him.

It was official. I had a crush.

But I couldn't tell if he felt the same way I did. He was usually so reserved, and none of our past interactions proved he felt anything toward me at all, other than friendship.

As I stepped out of the restroom and glanced over to his desk, I came to an abrupt stop at the scene before me.

Edward was hunched down, helping someone, a girl, with a mess on the floor. Papers and books were all over the place. She must have dropped them by mistake. And there he was, helping her.

He was a total gentleman, so I wasn't surprised that he was lending a hand. But the girl, talk about body language. The giggling, the touch on his arm, the nervous pulling of her hair behind her ears. She was totally flirting. And what's worse, she was just like him. Tortoise shell glasses, a little nerdy. For one brief moment, I saw the future—the two of them, walking hand-in-hand to the library, discussing physics, philosophy, his engineering projects, and her cure for Cancer.

I felt something twist in my gut, and I saw red. She couldn't take him. She couldn't have him. He was mine. He was supposed to talk to _me_ about that stuff. He was supposed to hold _my_ hand.

I shook myself out of my frozen stature and took a few breaths before casually walking up to his desk. They were finally upright; Edward was tapping her papers into a tidy pile on the desk as I heard his voice say something I couldn't decipher. When I heard her titter in response, I'd had enough.

I cleared my throat and tried to keep my expression neutral.

Edward's head snapped my way, and he fumbled to straighten his glasses. I'd caught him off guard.

"Bella," he virtually squeaked.

"Edward. How are you?" I said cooly. My eyes flitted to the girl. She was cute. _She would fit nicely with him_, I thought sadly.

"Uh, I'm fine. Um..." His eyes bounced between me and the girl several times before he turned to her. "I, uh, have to get back to work. Good luck with Professor Marcus. He's a tough one."

He waved awkwardly, and as I looked at the two of them, her expression was of a startled animal. But when her eyes shifted to me, it quickly morphed into a something else. Was she challenging me?

"Thanks, Edward. You've been such a big help. I'll see you around." And then the bitch kissed him on the cheek.

He swallowed hard and blushed before his eyes were on me cautiously.

I handed him my ID without looking at him. I couldn't.

With his head bowed, he took my card, fingers touching mine as always, and I could've sworn he held our connection a little longer than normal before pulling away.

"So, we're looking at slides today?" he said weakly, trying to make light conversation. Trying to be normal. This wasn't normal though.

"_I'm_ looking at slides today, yes," I emphasized.

"Oh, yeah. Of course. That's what I meant," he replied, sounding disappointed.

With slumped shoulders, he went to the back and immediately reappeared with my slide carousel. "Here you go," he said as he placed them on the counter.

"Thanks."

I grabbed the slides and headed to the AV rooms.

I didn't say another word. Not a smile.

I was a horrible person, a bad friend. My insides were all flip-floppy with nerves and something I couldn't really describe.

What the hell was wrong with me?

I sat in the cold dark AV room, clicking slide after slide, trying to focus on the information I needed to learn, but my thoughts kept returning to Edward and what had happened minutes before.

I had no right to treat him that way, to be so upset at him for flirting with a girl. He wasn't mine. Just the thought made my stomach drop.

After an hour or so of alternating between studying and thinking of Edward, I walked back to the reserve desk and quietly placed the carousel in front of him. When I looked up, he was already staring at me.

"Thanks, Edward. Um, can—"

"Bella, did I do something to upset you?" He blurted out. He looked dejected. Just how I felt.

I sighed loudly. I had to right this and soon. He was too nice of a friend, too sweet of a guy. And he'd done nothing to deserve my craziness.

"No, Edward. You didn't do anything. I'm sorry. I've just been stressed out... all these midterms. That's all. I'm really sorry I was a bitch earlier."

The relief on his face was immediate. "Oh, good. I'm clueless half the time to social cues, so I wasn't sure if I did something I didn't even know I did." He shook his head, taking his glasses off to clean them with the hem of his shirt.

The air left me the moment he looked up, sans glasses, and his dark green eyes shone from under long lashes and strong eye brows. Wow.

He stared, his brows rising, concerned. "Are you okay, Bella?"

"What? Oh, yeah, I'm fine." I took another breath. "You have nice eyes, you know that? Very expressive." The boy blushed and put his glasses back on, smiling timidly.

Then I did something without thinking.

I kissed him. On the cheek. Just like that girl. Only my lips stayed on his skin a beat longer. When I stepped away, his expression was unreadable. But his blush deepened, and it made me happy to see it.

I affected him.

"See you later, Edward."

I walked away with a bright smile on my face that could rival the sun.

...

Saturday morning was hell. Aside from the two hours I'd slept at early morning, I'd been up painting and putting the finishing touches on my work for today's critique. My professor was pretty laid back but always stressed having everything done by marked deadlines.

My cousin, Jasper, came over to help me load the big pieces into the flatbed of my truck. He was such a great guy. We'd grown up together like siblings.

"Thanks, Cuz. I owe you a drink. You guys still going?" I asked.

"Sure are. Alice said you'd be around like seven?" Jasper asked walking backwards towards his car.

"Yeah, around then. I wanna squeeze in a nap so I don't fall asleep on any of you."

"That would be bad."

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "Yeah, Captain Obvious, that would be bad. See you tonight!"

"Good luck!" he shouted, window down, as he drove away.

...

The critique was as I had imagined—long and uneventful. I did my thing, talked about the theme. Jamie, our professor, picked a couple from the six I'd done for the group show next weekend, and we were done.

My bed was a welcomed sight as I changed into my PJs and crawled under the cold sheets. After setting the alarm on my phone, I relaxed and replayed some of the comments from classmates and Jamie. But then, my thoughts shifted to my earlier conversation with Edward. My stomach started to flutter. Again.

My thought went to his beautiful face, and I fantasized about what it would feel like to kiss those soft, perfect lips, how the light bit of stubble he always sported would feel under my fingertips.

I was crushing hard on my Library Boy. I had no doubt that underneath the shy exterior lay a passion that no one expected from him.

And when he took off his glasses in front of me for the first time. Holy moly, those eyes.

There wasn't a shade among my paints that could match them, and I'd have a hell of a time trying to mix just the right amount of blue and green together.

Or maybe it had a little gray and gold?

I'd seen it right there in that moment. That passion I'd felt exuded from him. I was captivated in seconds, adding fuel to the fire that was already starting to get out of hand in my heart.

But just like that, they were gone—his glasses securely in place and his head bowed down shyly. It was almost as if he was two different people. The Edward he showed to the rest of the world, and the Edward that was just for me. Those eyes were just for me.

I kicked myself for not realizing what Alice had so easily seen weeks ago. We had chemistry, a real connection. Maybe I'd have to make the first move, see if he's receptive? Maybe I'd ask him out for a real date instead of sticking to short campus walks to the coffee shop. I needed more time with him, I knew _that_ for sure.

His eyes took up permanent residence in my head as I slipped into a deep sleep, thinking only of him.

...

"Okay, guys, let's do this!" Alice shouted as I did one last check of my hair in her bathroom mirror. I arrived an hour ago, as agreed upon, but had to wait for her to finish getting dressed. Typical.

"I'm ready when you are," I replied. We walked out into the living room to collect our bags and jackets and found Jasper already at the door, keys in hand.

"Geez, took you guys long enough. We're going to miss the first set if we don't get moving." Classic Jasper. The only times he'd get grumpy was if he was hungry or forced to wait while Alice finished getting ready.

"Chill, Jasper. We're not gonna miss anything. They don't go on until nine," Alice replied before Jasper playfully smacked her ass as she passed him and into the hallway of their condo. She gave him the finger and wiggled her butt for added effect.

For a split second, I imagined what it would be like to have Edward here, too. Maybe I should've asked him to come with us. Would he feel comfortable? Would he even want to go out with me? I realized I was going to make myself sick if I kept thinking about the what-ifs, so I took a deep breath, returning to the present.

"Very mature, you two," I chuckled, patting my cousin's cheek with my hand a little too hard.

"Ow! Look who's talking," Jasper protested.

...

"So what's this band we're so crazy about?" I asked, absently picking at my old chipped manicure in the back seat.

"MC3. They're mostly a cover band. Good stuff. Grunge, classic rock. But they play some original stuff, too. Seth's in it. Remember him, B? He was at that party we went to last year, with the guy with all the tats? Anyway, Seth and his older brother, Emmett, started it, and they just got a new guy on guitar. They said he's sick," Jasper explained, catching my eyes through the rearview mirror now and then.

"That sounds pretty good. I love grunge."

"Yeah, and Seth's girl, Emily, tells me he's a little hottie, B."

"I'm sitting right here," Jasper protested.

"I know, babe. I said it for Bella's sake."

I laughed to myself, shaking my head. She was always trying to fix me up.

"Alice..."

"What? I'm just saying," she said, feigning innocence.

"I'm perfectly capable of picking my own dates, thank you very much."

"I never said you weren't. But you gotta admit it's been a while."

"I went on a date last week."

"With the cutie-patooty Library Boy? That doesn't count. It was coffee on campus."

"Well, how about Mike? He was nice, and sorta good looking," I said in half-defensive.

"Too goody-goody, if you ask me. I'm always a little creeped out by the all-American boy thing. I mean, he side-parted his hair, and it always looked a little crunchy. And he liked to wear those old man Dockers with the pleats. _And_, that was last semester, and you only went out with him once."

"I didn't feel a spark, but he wasn't all bad. I mean, how many baseball players actually like art? That's hard to find."

"No, it's not. Any guy will pretend to like anything you like to get into your pants."

"Hey!" Jasper finally interceded.

"Except for you, babe."

"Damn straight," he replied.

...

Jasper found a parking spot close to the venue and we all hopped out. A big red blocky sign on the top of the nondescript door glowed "The Bar." That was it.

We sat down in a booth close to the stage. The atmosphere was super casual, kind of gritty but intimate. Totally my kind of place. Our waitress came by to take our drink orders. Once that was taken care of, we fell into conversation about everything and nothing. We toasted to my successful critique and entry into the group show just as the band members started to set up and take the stage.

Jasper whistled loudly, using his thumb and finger, as Seth adjusted the mic stand. He spotted Jasper, smiled, and quirked his chin up in acknowledgement as another bigger, broader guy walked towards the drums. They looked exactly alike, aside from their builds. I assumed he was Seth's big brother.

The place had filled up, and the buzz was contagious. I was suddenly really excited to see them play.

"Look, that's the new guy," Alice half-shouted in my ear over the noise from the crowd.

He was hanging back on a stool, placing his guitar strap around his neck. He had on a beanie and a plaid button-down, but he was sitting to the side, under the shadows, so I couldn't see much else.

"I can't tell from here what he looks like. Maybe during the show or something," I shouted back to her.

Cheers erupted all around me as Seth greeted the crowd. The lights dimmed, enveloping us in darkness, save for the one spotlight on him. As soon as the first guitar riffs rang out, I smiled. Pearl Jam. Track two from _Ten._ I found myself singing along with everybody else.

It's when the mystery guitarist suddenly stood up and the spotlight focused on him that I nearly fell out of my chair.

"Edward?" I think I yelled, but with the music and the crowd, it might as well have been a whisper.

Edward Cullen... Mr. Library Geek, was front and center playing his guitar. Rock music. At a bar. And...

I'd never seen him like this: faded, ripped jeans; flannel shirt over a Stooges tee; no glasses.

He was fucking hot.

And as my mind was hard at work, trying to reconcile the version of the boy I saw every week and the version standing before me, he was making his guitar sing. I watched as girls ran to the stage to fawn over him, and I felt an irrational amount of jealousy—a need to claim him as mine. _He's mine! Damn it!_

But once again, I had to remind myself he _wasn't_ mine, and the notion pissed me the hell off.

I watched his facial expressions as they ran through two more songs—the way he clenched his eyes shut as he played. Wow. My mind went right to the gutter, imagining that face above me as he was doing something else with me... to me.

I was jostled out of my fantasies by raucous applause and screaming women, Alice at my ear.

"Oh, my God! Wait... Bella, is that who I think it is? Isn't that your Library Boy?"

I stood with everyone else but was frozen in place amidst the chaos around me. I was staring... transfixed by Edward, who seemed to have laid his soul out for all to see through his music.

As the boys waved and bowed to the crowd, I stared only at him, almost willing him to see me. And to my surprise, it happened.

I could see him, scanning the crowd almost as if he was searching for someone. When his eyes finally met mine, recognition dawned, and his expression became indecipherable. His head dipped, and he quickly left the stage, leaving his bandmates momentarily confused before returning their attention to their adoring fans.

Something in me snapped me. I had to go to him. I had to.

As I started to leave, Alice caught my hand.

"Where are you going?" she yelled over the noise.

"I have to go. Text me before you leave," I shouted back.

"Ha! I knew it! Go get him, girl!"

"Whatever, Alice! I'll call you later!" I rushed towards the back of the bar, weaving and pushing my way through the crowd as I made my way past the stage.

The sounds of the club were muffled as I walked past an empty green room. At the end of the hall, I saw an exit door. I tentatively pushed it open and looked around the alley before my eyes landed on him.

His back was to me, but there he was: tall with riotous hair, his beanie gone and black hoodie back on , and holding a cigarette. I never would've thought he was a smoker, and as disgusting as I thought the habit was, I wasn't grossed out.

His body seemed tense as he paced back and forth. His hands raked through his hair. I think it was the most animated I'd ever seen him.

I walked slowly, as if approaching a scared animal, but when a piece of broken glass cracked under the weight of my feet, his head snapped towards me, eyes wide.

No glasses. My memory from yesterday came flooding back in that instant, and my knees weakened.

"Hey."

"Wha–what are you doing here?" He stammered, looking nervous and out of place.

"My friends know Seth," I said softly, walking just a little closer until I was in front of him, about arm's length away.

He replied with a nod, and realizing he still had his cigarette in his hand, he quickly threw it on the floor and stomped it out. "Sorry. I know it's a bad habit. I'm trying to quit. I didn't expect for you to—"

"No, it's okay. Really, Edward." I sighed, before we fell into an uncomfortable silence.

After what seemed like minutes, I dug my hands into my own hoodie and decided to try again. "You were really amazing up there. When did you start playing? Why didn't you ever tell me you were in a band?"

His eyes were intense as he looked at me, the sparse lighting in the alleyway making them darker than usual. He shifted his weight and looked down at his feet.

_Here's the Edward I know_, I thought.

"Um, I started when I was twelve. I was, uh, really shy." He looked up to see me grin at this. "Well, more than I am now," he chuckled.

"I kinda taught myself. I'd get home from school after enduring a day of bullying and kids making fun of me, and I'd listen to my dad's Jimi Hendrix and Zeppelin albums on vinyl and thought how cool they were. I figured if I wanted to be cool, I'd have to learn to play." He sighed before continuing. "And I didn't tell you because I really haven't told anyone yet. This is only my third time with Seth and Em. Music is kind of my escape from what I do at school. It's a part of myself I find hard to share with people I know. It's a lot easier with perfect strangers, you know? That's why I'm so in awe of you and your ability to put so much of yourself in what you paint and then show to everyone."

He looked at me again through his impossibly long lashes, and my God, I wanted to just kiss him right then and there. Not sure if it was the drink I'd had earlier or the sudden rush of emotions from seeing him play, but I wanted to feel his lips on mine.

So I did.

I lunged forward and grabbed his face with my hands, catching a glimpse of his shocked expression before my lips roughly found his.

It wasn't perfect, at least not at the beginning. But as soon as Edward's scared-frozen lips started to move tentatively against mine, everything changed.

He breathed me in before his hands finally found my waist, sending a warm current through my body. This was happening. Oh, my God.

My hands travelled to the back of his neck, and I grabbed on to his damp but soft, messy hair. I never realized how badly I wanted to do that until that very moment.

As our kiss deepened, I could have sworn I was moving forward and was proven right when his body hit the brick wall of the bar. I didn't know if I had pushed him or if he'd pulled us, and it didn't really matter. His lips were so much better than I'd imagined; soft but strong, gentle but insistent.

I was making out with Edward Cullen. Brilliant, thoughtful, soft-spoken, hot-as-fuck Edward Cullen.

"Bella," he panted against my mouth.

"Yeah?" I said against his skin as I kissed down the column of his neck. That's when he let out a groan.

"Oh, shit," he hissed, his hands roving up my back and into my hair. It made me giddy to know I affected him this way, even more when I pressed myself against him, feeling the start of a very impressive erection.

"Bella..."

"Mmmmm..."

"Bella, wait, just stop a minute," he panted, his hands stilling mine.

I froze and leaned away, catching my breath. "You want me to stop?"

"No. Hell, no, I don't want you to stop, but I need to ask you something."

"Um, okay." I started to step back before he gripped me harder, stilling my movements again.

"No. No, please, don't pull away. I just want to know, are you reacting like this just because of what you saw tonight, or…" His eyes searched mine.

I thought about it. Knowing I had been feeling something for him for weeks made me smile. My hands found his warm, stubbled cheek, and my thumb grazed it lightly.

"I think tonight solidified what I've been feeling for a while now. You showed me a part of yourself that I've only seen in glimpses before. Just now, on stage, I saw your soul." I kissed him again, just a sweet peck this time. "You overwhelmed me.

"You're beautiful, Edward. Your soul is beautiful."

He stared at me a while without saying a word, just holding on to my hips, squeezing me possessively.

Then he spoke, his voice low but steady.

"You had me from the first second I saw you."

"What? When?" I asked, my heart bursting out of my chest at the thought of him feeling the same way I did.

He chuckled. "Last semester. You were taking that contemporary art history course, and you were all flustered because you hated the professor. You told me you were a painting student, and you were just so pretty." His hands moved to my back, bringing me even closer to him. "I went to the student gallery right after my shift that day to look for your painting. As soon as I saw it, I saw you. Like inside..." He nervously shifted his eyes from me when he said that.

My heart. It danced.

"Why didn't you ever say anything? Ask me out or something?"

He finally looked up again, one side of his lips lifting into an impossibly sexy smirk.

"Didn't think I had a chance. Like, not even in the same league."

"Edward, we talked about books, art history, and Star Wars. How could we not be in the same league?"

Then he laughed. Like really laughed. And the sound was just...

Just perfect.

And I wanted him even more.

"Yeah, but it's you, you know? _Bella Swan_. It's hard to explain." His hands wrapped tighter around me, and I melted against him.

Just when I was about to argue some more, the back door squeaked open, the noise from within filling up the silence we enjoyed just before.

Seth peeked his head out. "Hey, Cullen, we're about to... oh, shit. Sorry."

Edward pushed us away from the wall, loosening his hold on me and disappointedly adding a little distance between us.

"Gimmie a sec. I'll be right there," he replied, never taking his eyes off of me. Seth nodded once before heading back inside.

Now it was my turn to feel shy and awkward. Where did we got from here?

"I have to go back in for the second set. Will you stay? Maybe, if you want, we could go grab some coffee or something after?" he asked. His hand slowly reached for mine and tangled our fingers together.

He looked hopeful. I was hopeful, too.

"Yeah." I nodded. "I'll stay."


End file.
